Inner Athlete

Today was one of those days.  You know those days.  When you wake up you realize you are cranky.  Nothing seems to be right.  You don't look right.  You don't feel right.  It isn't right.  Today was that day.  I looked in the mirror and decided to get dressed.  I was going to look nice.  I was going to wear my cute brown shorts with my cute pink top.  I put those on and looked in the mirror.  To what did my eyes see?  A belly roll over the top of my cute brown shorts.  I was mortified.  I am not that person.  I have been running regularly.  I have even included speed work into my runs.  What happened?  I instantly IMed my sister and told her the horrifying news.  We decided I probably need to do more than just run.  I needed to challenge myself.  As Sam went to bed, and I sat chewing on my self-pity, I went over to my parents house for lunch. 

I watched ESPN.  I watched women's soccer recaps, and I realized my inner athlete had been lost.  Before I left my parents house, my dad said something to me out of the blue.  He said, "sometimes in life you have to work for what you want and have."  As I drove home, I mulled over his comment.  He is right again (I hope he doesn't read this.).  When I was younger, I had to work to be a better softball player.  When I wanted to play outfield, I practiced constantly.  My dad would hit fly balls at me over and over again.  When he needed me to be a pitcher, I practiced pitching every day.  I didn't complain about it.  I did it.  I loved it.  I wanted to be an amazing athlete.  I wanted to be the best.  My drive to be the best I could be continued when I finally ended up being a catcher.  My dad told me to duck walk around the house to strengthen my legs.  I did.  During junior high and high school, I became a volleyball player.  I wasn't a stellar volleyball player.  I didn't just walk out there and become the stud needed to save the day.  I worked at it.  My coach needed someone to several consistently, so I practiced.  Endlessly practiced.  This drive resurfaced when I decided to become a runner.  I was not a runner.  I did not "look" like a runner.  I wanted to run a 5k, yet I couldn't walk a block.  I took one step at a time, and eventually I made it.  Naturally, I gravitated to challenging myself some more.  I have completed more 5Ks, 10Ks, and halves than I can count.  I have even run three marathons.  What did I want from this marathon?  I wanted a sub 5:30.  How am I going to achieve this goal?  Training, pushing the limits.  Yesterday was the first time I pushed myself.  I kicked up the speed work on the treadmill.  The work felt great.  I am not a speedster, so to get a better time I am going to have to work at it.  I am going to have to be the person I have been all my life.  The girl who worked hard.  I am that girl.  What does that girl look like?  She is the one giving it her all.  I am going to regain the athlete I lost when I settled for what my inner thoughts were telling me.  How can I be the person to push my children and my students when I am not willing to push myself?  I will regain the inner athlete. 

Support Unit

While running on the treadmill this morning, I was hashing over a conversation I had in my kitchen with my mom.  Mostly it was a comment I made.  The comment was bugging me as I stared at the text message my friend Sheila had sent me with encouraging words to get my four miles in before the day was over.  As I stared at her text, my words echoed in my head.  In a moment of bitchiness, I made a comment about eccentric ideas.  Me the hypocrite who is always looking for support did not show support this morning.  I have been working on creating a support unit to get me to the finish line of the CIM with a faster time, yet I am not willing to be supportive of a diet plan.  Did I ask how I could help?  No, I was in a pissy mood because it was inconveniencing me.  How dare I?  As I pounded out a few miles on the treadmill, I realized how obnoxious and hurtful my comment was.  I vowed at that moment to be supportive of every ones desire to get into shape or to be thin.  It is what I am constantly striving for.  It is also what I am constantly asking people to help me with.  I truly did not mean to be obnoxious or rude, but in a lapse of judgment I was.  No more!  I am usually a supportive person, and by recognizing my stupidity I have taken a step closer to being a better person (I hope).

Folsom Firecracker 5k -- Race Report

For whatever reason, I changed my mentality from racing to organized running.  I know in my mind I am not going to win, but I get myself worked up over racing.  I get to the starting line, and I start comparing myself to the other runners.  Do I look right?  Am I prepared enough?  I cause myself a panic attack every time.  My last “race” was in January.  My dad watched me work myself into a frenzy.  As my dad watched my demeanor change, he took me to the side to talk to me.  He reminded me of my preparation and hard work.  He also reminded me I am not going to win.  I needed to go out there and run my race.  This conversation between my dad and I resonated with me.  When I registered for the Folsom Firecracker 5k, I didn’t consider it a race.  My mentality changed.  I kept calling it an organized run.  I also decided this run would be a fun one.  I would enjoy the run. 

When Jeremy and I got up, we started joking around.  Jeremy and Conner were going to run together, so I was on my own. 

My dad picked us up because he was going to watch Brodie while we ran.  We chattered all the way to the run site. 

My dad looks so happy to be up and taking pictures.  Brodie wasn’t quite sure what was going on, but he knew we were running.  Later in the morning, he asked if he could start running with mommy, daddy, and Conner.

Not only does this picture make me smile, it makes me laugh because my dad did not know how to take pictures on the iPhone. 

When we arrived at Lake Natoma area, we were greeted by a sad sign. 

Who steals from an organized run?  It doesn’t make sense.  The money goes to charities/organizations.  Lame!!  Despite the bummer beginning, the organizers kept the race very professional and motivating.  Everyone was supportive, positive, and encouraging.  I was in heaven!

I was impressed with the turn out for the 3^rd Annual Folsom Firecracker 5k/10k.  As the group took off running, I set into a pace comfortable for me.  For the first .10, I walked/jogged with Jeremy and Conner.  Unfortunately, the pace was uncomfortable for me.  Jeremy was trying to keep Conner at an even pace because he tends to take off too fast.  Jeremy and Conner started talking about Pokemon, so I knew they were ok.  I settled into a pace which was comfortable.  I continued to run with ease.  During the first walk break, Kei$ha’s /Blow was on my iPod.  I love this song, so I kept running through my first walk break.  The pace continued to feel great, but I wanted to keep with my plan.  I didn’t want to get caught up in the hype of the race and tire out too early.  I was unsure of the rolling hills, or what the course would bring to me.  When RunKeeper signed for the next walk break, I took it.  I am really glad I did.  It kept me going strong throughout the whole course.  My training in Citrus Heights and Roseville on rolling hills paid off.  Those people who started out too quickly were fading.  I began passing people on the hills, and I was feeling great.  During my walk breaks, I kept a good pace.  I power walked to keep at least a 14-15 minute mile.  I wanted to keep my overall time in check.  I am proud of my finish! 

195	Erin Muse	Citrus Heights CA	910	31	F	36:22.99	36:56.96	11:44

Jeremy and Conner did an amazing job as well.  After I crossed the finish line, I went back to run with Conner and Jeremy for a bit.  I am sure this is probably unacceptable in turns of organized runs, but I was really proud of Conner.  He kicked in the afterburners on his way to the finish line, and I could not keep up. 

The Folsom Firecracker 5k was an amazing race!!  I enjoyed every moment of it!

Thanks to Jeremy's comment, I have a little more information about Conner's run. 

I held Conner back for 3 of the miles. The boy just wanted to take off, and he probably would have been fine, just needed a few more breaks.


He would walk for about 30 seconds each time and then take off. He impressed everybody he passed. Then, in the final 0.1 of the run, I told him to take off, and he did running a 6.02 min/mile pace. It was awesome. Couldn't have been prouder of the little guy.

Again, a great family fun run!

Week 5: Race to the CIM Finish Recap

Week 5: Total Miles: 10.51

Monday: Rest
I am exhausted from our late night return.  I spent most of the day sleeping.  I plan on getting a 15 minute strength training routine in.

Tuesday: 3.01 miles

I was a tad bit tired this morning, so the 5:45 am alarm did not make me happy.  I quickly hit snooze, and I feel back to sleep.  I have not been sleeping well at night, so I didn’t want to push it.  I must have needed the sleep because I fell quickly back to sleep.  By the time I woke up, I was trying to figure out how I was going to get my run in.  My seven and four year old has made some of my training runs a challenging.  We have a treadmill in the garage, so I decided today would be a treadmill day while the boys played in the garage or outside. 

For whatever reason, I started calling this guy Ted once I finished running.  I decided I was going to work on my speed while at a 1% incline.  In the end, I felt strong.  It isn’t my favorite way to run, but I am glad I got it done.  I realized after this run, I could have split my run two.  Lesson learned. J

Wednesday: 3.5 miles planned/XT actually

Again, I slept in this morning.  I didn’t realize how tired I am.  I had 3.5 miles on the schedule for today, but the day got away from me.  The boys had a t-ball celebration this evening, so I knew going running afterwards was not in the cards.  Instead of doing a run, I did a leg sculpting work out from Nike Training Club.

In the most basic sense, this workout is great.  I can do it in the backyard while the boys swim.  I started with 15 minutes because strengthwise, I am not in very good shape.  I hope eventually I will work up to a more strenuous workout.  I am also excited to report my friends, Sheila and Aaron will be running the California International Marathon with me.  I cannot wait.  This will be their first marathon. 

  They will be amazing!  I am so glad they are joining me on this journey!

Thursday: 3 miles planned/3.5 miles actually

I made an adjustment to my training plan because yesterday got away from me.  I woke up sore this morning, so I knew a run would help shake out the stiffness.  Most of the day, I spent weeding the backyard.  I didn’t realize how much sun I was getting, or how little water I was drinking.  When I set out for the run, I knew I was doomed.  My calves began cramping around a mile into my run.  I decided I would adjust my form, and push through.  I knew I would feel better if I got through this run.  Before I could focus too much on my calves, I was concerned more with my headphones.  I needed to get use to training with them because going without was not going to be a possibility.  I did not want to annoy the people around me, so it was time to make a few adjustments.  The first few walk breaks I focused on readjusting the headphones.  By the time I settled into a groove, I was two miles into my run.  No problem calves, I run one and a half miles all the time.  I’ve got this in the bag.  By the time I returned home, I began rehydrating again.  My body began thanking me for the water.  I am glad I got out there and ran.   Without bad training runs, I would not be able to have good runs. 

Friday: Rest

Given all of the activities I did yesterday, I was really sore.  I realized I had been working on the backyard for as long as the boys were in the pool.  Doing the simple math, it was four hours.  Four hours of weeding.  Holy Cow!  I stretched in the pool and on land today, but that was about it.

Saturday: 4 miles

I struggled to get out and go this morning.  If it hadn’t been for my promise to Sheila to text when I got up and left, I probably wouldn’t have run today.  I know some weeks are easier than others.  All that matters in the end is the days we get out and run when our mind is telling us to stay at home.  While I was running, I realized about two miles in I wouldn’t make the four miles by the time I returned home.  I decided it would be better to add a mile on to the middle versus the end.  I am really glad I did.  In the end, I was thankful I got up and ran this morning.

 It wasn’t my fastest time, but it was my time.  J

Sunday: Rest/XT
I spent most of today running around with my family.  Nothing too exciting, but walking around Costco and Sam’s club.  After a warm day, I decided to dip in the pool for a bit.  I didn’t want to do too much because I have a 5k run tomorrow morning.  I am excited to get out there with other runners tomorrow.  My goal is to run the 5k between 30-35 minutes.  Doable! 

Are you Prepared?

Today's blog is compliments of my baby sister Sam in the 'Stan.  In the 21 days she was home, I learned a lot of things about me.  It is funny how and when life teaches you her lessons, but I am greatful when I am paying attention.  Thanks Sam for teaching me! 

Sam is the one on the right.  Don't forget life is about having fun and enjoying the moment!

Think of the scariest movie you’ve ever seen or the most adventurous book you’ve ever read. Whether it’s Jaws by Steven Spielberg, or Lord of the Rings by J.R.R Tolkien. Now as you think of it, imagine yourself as the character swimming away from the giant shark or the hobbit that must walk his way through the mountains and caves. You know you’ve done it; imagined yourself as that character, as the hero. If you were in that position, would you have made the same decisions? In your physical state at this very moment, would you even be able to swim fast enough to get away or last 20 minutes hiking up a hill?

I know these may seem like odd questions, but when I read a book, I always imagine myself as the character, and I always wonder, would I be able to do it better or last longer. The book that I always think about in moments when I question my physique is World War Z by Max Brooks. I read this book two and half years ago. It’s a story about the world being at war with zombies. No, I don’t believe in zombies, nor do I even like reading Sci-Fi books about zombies. But even for my dislike of such a genre, I have to say this book really captured my attention. The main reason is because the book is written through the eyes of the interviewees from around the world. Some of the stories were about people fighting off the zombies, while others spoke of running miles to get away, climbing down the outside of buildings, or hiking for hours just to avoid catching the “disease”.

And that is what intrigued me so much. If there was another World War and the attack happened in my hometown, would I be physically fit to fight back, to climb out windows, to run 5 miles fast enough not to be caught? Two and a half years ago, the answer would have been no. I’m nothing if not honest with myself and I knew I couldn’t even run a half mile without being winded. This book was so well written that it made me question, minus the zombies, if a war happened at any moment, would I be ready? I suddenly knew that I was not. And for some reason, that really pushed me to get off my bed and start being active.

Ironically, a year and a half later, I found myself in a war zone, Afghanistan to be exact. Here, I have to train wearing forty pounds of body armor. I run up four flights of stairs in this stuff at 2am, for training. We practice running from one car to another in our gear, pretending we are under attack. We practice climbing up tiny ladders to a secure point wearing the body armor. And in one region, I’m not going to lie, in case of an emergency, we had to jump from one roof top to another, exactly four and a half feet apart, with our body armor. All as part of our training!

Fortunately, I have never had to use any of this under a real attack, but that hasn’t stopped us from being prepared. And that is why I often think about this book. About how it was my catalyst to get me off the bed and start working out. Because you never know what life may bring or where it might take you. So when you read this, or watch your scary movie or read your adventure book, ask yourself, in this moment, right now while I’m reading this, would I be physically able to do what this person is doing or has done? And if you are honest with yourself, you may be encouraged to get up and do something!

From Sam in the 'Stan ;)

Struggles

Every once in a while runs don't come so easily.  Today was one of those days.  Thank goodness Sheila asked me to send her a text when I got up to get ready to run.  I had planned on getting up at 6 this morning to get my four miler done before the temperature heated up.  For whatever reason, I woke up slightly at 5:30.  I wasn't awake at all.  My head was pounding.  I decided I would sleep for another hour in hopes my head would stop hurting, and the run would not be a disaster.  When my alarm went off at 7, I was strongly considering blowing off the run.  Knowing Sheila was waiting for my text, I got up.  I sent her text apologizing for sleeping in an extra hour.  I was thankful when she said she slept too. 



Sheila (and her husband Aaron) definitely was what I needed to get out the door.  We are training partners without being able to train together.  We both managed to get out the door.  We got our long run in before the heat of the day, and before we met up to watch a movie with our families. 

Instead of stopping when I hit the four mile marker, I pushed through to finish at the stop sign about .25 miles from my house.  I was so excited about this run in an odd way.  Sheila pushed me out the door.  I made sure I completed the mileage I had on the books.  It was a great day.  This run, and all of the struggles of week five, made me really thankful I can mentally push through any issues during the marathon.

Training Runs = Learning Experiences

As I struggled to get out the door, I realized I needed to figure out what to do with my headphones.  I have been running without them which means my music has been playing.  Knowing I had a race coming up, I needed to figure out how I was going to handle the music otherwise I need to go without.  I set out today in hopes of a nice easy 3.5 mile run.  Unfortunately, I was not having an easy go of it.  My legs were cramping (thank you gardening for four hours and not drinking much water).  After about half a mile, my headphones were annoying me.  During my first walk break, I adjusted my headphones.  I ran the next four minutes being continously annoyed.  Then the next walk break occurred, I made another adjustment.  It was better, but it was not going to make it through 3 miles.  Finally, I made one more tweak.  It wasn't bad, but it wasn't amazing.  I am going to need to get use to running with these new headphones otherwise I will need to run without music or "coaching".  I also need to constantly remind myself to drink water.  Hydration is important.  Without proper hydration, my legs cramp up like crazy!!

Strength Training and Friends

Instead of doing a run today, I decided to incorporate some strength training exercises into my day.  I downloaded the Nike Training Club app which allows me to have strength training moves at my fingertips.  It also allows me the opportunity to start small and work my way into strength training.  I truly believe strength traininging has added to my running speed and endurance.  Lately I have been doing my strength training workouts in the backyard with my kettleball while my boys are swimming.   They get to do a fun activity while I am doing a fun activity.  A win-win situation. 

As of today, another friend will be running the CIM with me.  Sheila's husband Aaron.  Neither of them have run a marathong, but I know they will be awesome.  They are great athletes, and they very supportive and encouraging.  Our goals are different for this race, and I know in the end we will all achieve them.  I am so excited they are joining me!!



Training Schedule for Week of June 27th

June 27th	June 28th	June 29th	June 30th	July 1st	July 2nd	July 3rd
XT	3 miles	3.5 miles	3 miles	Rest	4 miles	Rest

Week 4: Road to CIM Finish

Week 4:  Total Miles: 11.84

Monday: 2 miles

I did this run with the boys today.  It was not quite as successful as I had hoped, but we got out there.  The plan for tomorrow is to go earlier, so it will not be as hot.  J

Tuesday: 3 miles

The Muse family is heading to Disneyland this afternoon.  Because I have two training runs while we are gone, I want to make sure I pack my running clothes.  I didn’t want to have the opportunity to pack my stuff without running.  Considering it is going to be 101 today, I decided to get up early.  I knew I had the opportunity to take a nap later, so I figured it wouldn’t be a problem.  I am so glad I went running.  It was amazing weather (sunny and 70 degrees), and a nice route.  I mapped it out last night.  It was something different, but something doable.  As I ran, I broke up the run in segments.  By the time I finished running, I realized I had eight segments.  Once I finished the first part, I was feeling pretty good.  When I hit number four, I was feeling even more confident.  I didn’t want my walk break to happen more than once on a segment.  As I turned the corner for portion number six, I saw some horse.  I am going to take the boys by to seem the horse.  They will love it!

Wednesday: Rest/XT

Officially on my running schedule, today is considered a rest day.  However, we went to Disneyland which meant plenty of walking.  I really have no idea how far or how long we walked, but we did none-the-less.  This kind of walking is definitely not power walking by any stretch of the imagination, but it is walking.

Thursday: 2.5 miles on schedule/3.21 miles actually

Before I left for Disneyland/San Diego, I mapped out my runs on mapmyrun.com.  I wanted a general idea of where I was running, so I wouldn’t feel overwhelmed and the chances of getting lost while on a family vacation were smaller.  I don’t mind losing myself in a run, but I don’t want my family to have to suffer because of it.  Today was an early morning entrance day, so Jeremy and the boys wanted to be in the park by 7 am.  This means leaving the hotel by 6:30.  I knew I would be able to take a nap later on in the day, so getting up at 5 am was not a problem.  I was also oddly excited by running around Disneyland.  I have only done this type of run during both the half marathon at Disneyland.  Over the last several times I have been to Disneyland, I have talked about running while on vacation but I have never actually run.  This was about to change.  I set out in perfect weather.  The cast members were really nice.  Most of them said hi or waved.  It was friendly and safe.  During my run, I passed a mom (at least I am assuming she was a mom) walking and a dad running.  I apparently was not the only one who needed some mommy time.  I thought about what my family had done the day before, and I was excited to know what we would be doing later that day.  I took a picture on my run.  It is a tad bit blurry, but what do you expect to get when running and taking a picture. 

It was a beautiful run.  Running around the perimeter of Disneyland ended up being further than my projected 2.5 mile run.  I felt great.  My legs and body were strong.  I was pretty hydrated, so I went with how my body felt.  I also ran faster than usual.  All in all, it was an amazing run!  Again, our family did a lot of walking around Disneyland, so I was able to stretch out nicely.

Friday: Rest/Travel Day/XT

As stated early, I adjusted my schedule this week.  I am really glad I did because I was able to take today off because it was our last day at Disneyland, and we would be heading to San Diego.  I was still feeling pretty great after my run yesterday.  At the Padres game, I met an usher (Dave) who lived in Massachusetts as a little boy.  As we got to talking, I found out he has run 75 marathons.  He was the most inspiring man I have met.  We chatted about the CIM, the Boston, and his favorite the Marine Corps marathon.  Dave does not like CIM because of the weather.  I understood completely what he was talking about, but for whatever reason I feel like I have something to conquer here.  He also told me to put in the work, so I would qualify for the Boston.  He said it will be like no other marathon.  Dave is right about putting in the work.  I definitely need to do that.  We exchanged email information, and we promised to keep in touch.  He told me Marine Corps needed to be on my bucketlist which I can say I have definitely added.  Dave rekindled my love/passion for running.     

Saturday: 3.5 miles on schedule/3.63 actually

At first, I was a little worried I wouldn’t get this run in.  We had a late night on Friday from the Padres game, and I was really tired.  My plan was to run early before the family got up, but there were a few other factors I was going to have to factor into my run.  My in laws did not have a spare key, so I was going to have to cater this run around their work schedule or my husband being up.  Originally, we were going to hang out at the beach, so a nap might not happen.  With a late night and early morning, I really did not want to be cranky.  I opted to sleep in.  I ended up waking up at 8 am.  Jeremy told me I could go out running, and we would leave after I returned.  I am so thankful for a supportive husband!  He knew this run was important to me.  I quickly got dressed, and I took off.  I had mapped out this run, but I wasn’t sure how it was going to turn out.  I knew the area in which my in laws lived is very hilly.  I have hills around my house, so I was not too worried until I saw the quarter to half mile of uphill I was going to have to run.  I set off with confidence.  The original loop I had planned changed because mapmyrun does not take in account the side of the road I run on, or any other difference.  No big deal.  When I hit the two mile mark, I turned around to make it an out and back course.  It was great.  The run started to get a tad bit warm towards the end because the weather was heating up in San Diego, but it was worth it. 

Sunday: Rest/XT

Our little family ended up back in Disneyland, so I was able to walk around some more.  I didn’t do too much other than that because I was tired.  It was nice to have a rest day in the books.  J

Return to Training

Last night, I got my happy self out the door for a nice run.  I didn't go as far as I would have liked to have run because I had a headache.  I guess I have been under a little more stress than I thought.  I ended up running 2 miles.  During my run portion, I ran faster (about 10 minute miles).  Unfortunately, the walk portion equals about fifteen minute miles.  Nothing to write home about, but moving none-the-less. 

What is the plan for tonight?  I am not running.  I am going to be going out line dancing with my husband.  I can't wait actually.  It is something new and we both love it!

Will this blog...

...get me into trouble?  Will this blog give me motivation?  What will this blog do for me?  I am not sure.  I feel that 2011 is going to be my year.  I am not sure why or how or what needs to be done, but it is going to be great. 

In this blog, I am going to write about all kinds of random moments.  What gets me out the door on my runs?  How my students end up motivating me to go further and push harder?  I will also be posting whatever else I feel like writing.

Ultimately, I have many goals.  By January 8th, 2012, I want to have run enough miles to get me from here to Disney World.  Why?  Jeremy and I will be running a marathon on the 8th of January 2012.  I am ecstatic and scared all at the same time.  Why?  The last marathon I ran, I did not to do so well.  It sent me into an abyss of self-doubt.  It took me almost a year to return to running consistently.  My dad had a hand it this return.  He told me that I would be successful if I run my own race, or think of it as a run.  Could this be possible?  On my first race/run, my parents were there.  I was having an anxiety attack.  I am pretty sure my dad had never seen me show such doubt in myself.  He reminded me to go out there and just run.  I decided he was right about two minutes into the race.  I have been running consistently, so I knew I could complete the task.  Little did I know, I would do so well.  I beat my time by three minutes.  I also realized that the way I had been training was going to get me through my marathon.  There is no need for me to feel like I am not going to make it.  I will.  I may even have a much better time than before!!  :)  Not only that, I will most have more fun than before.  What I need to do the most though is get past my negativity.  I also need to get myself out the door more consistently. 

How to do that?  How does one get themselves out the door more consistently?  Should I get up early and run?  If I do that, I have no excuse.  Should I wait until I get home?  I seem to feel like I am able to go longer if I go at night.  Hhhhmmm, I hate getting up early.  I think it has to do with the fact that my family is asleep in their beds.  It is nice and warm.  The downside of running at night, I am easily sidetracked.  I need to force myself out to run for at least a mile.  No matter what I do.  I need to go for a minimum of one mile.  That is simple enough.  As long as I go for one mile, I can easily add on or stop at one mile.   I think I will plan for a run in the morning.  If for some reason I don't get out the door, I will go after dinner.  I think that is the best option.  It allows me the freedom I need to get a run in.  Then as time goes on, I might be able to get better at either running in the am or running at night.  As of now, I put it off and then I don't do it.  That will not get me to my goal. 

I'll blog about my adventure tomorrow morning.  :)